The Thief and the Archaeologist: The Thief
by Cleo the Muse
Summary: Ever wonder what happened to Vala immediately after she left with the al'kesh? Takes place just after 'Prometheus Unbound'. Mild sexual innuendo, but hey, it's VALA! COMPLETE, see 'The Archaeologist' for more adventures.
1. The Theft of the Thief

**The Theft of the Thief **by Cleo the Muse

_"One should hold fast one's heart; for when one letteth it go, how quickly doth one's head run away!"_  
-- Friedrich Nietzsche, _Thus Spake Zarathustra_

* * *

Sarilis Camir, former bounty hunter and mechanic extraordinaire, looked up from the power generator she was attempting to repair when the door to her shop opened. Expecting to see one of the Berelli brothers or some other boisterous mercenary, she was surprised to see Vala Mal Duran walk through the entrance. The notorious thief and occasional tenant glanced around the shop's interior quickly, then made her way to the worktable. "Hello, Sarilis," she grinned.

"Vala," the older woman acknowledged. "What brings you here? Steal something that needs fixing?"

"Actually, no. You'd be surprised how much even a _damaged_ al'kesh brings on the market these days."

Sarilis snorted. "You managed to steal an al'kesh?"

The dark-haired thief draped herself dramatically across the chair opposite the shopkeeper. "Well, first I stole a Kell suit, _then_ I stole a tel'tac."

Sarilis' jaw dropped. "How did you get a Kell warrior's suit?"

"Andron got one from a Jaffa rebel... and it's not like _he_ could use it, he's far too short and tubby."

"Vala!"

"The tel'tac was pretty badly damaged, so I used it to get to an al'kesh. Unfortunately, the Jaffa on board weren't too keen on giving it up, so _it_ wound up in shambles, too--hyperdrive was _totally_ shot, and sublight engines weren't much better. Basically, I had two ships and _both_ were junk."

The shopkeeper shook her head in amusement. "How'd you get it back here, then?"

Vala propped her feet up on the table and tipped her chair back, idly playing with the streak of white in her hair. "I sent out a distress call. After all, I _had_ promised Tennet O'Voran I'd get him a ship in exchange for the naquadah _he_ promised _me_, so I figured if someone were stupid enough to answer my signal, I'd relieve them of _their_ ship instead."

Sarilis noticed, for the first time, that the normally conspicuous garb of the thief had been replaced by a one-piece blue suit, not at all dissimilar to her own comfortable work clothing. Simple boots covered her restless feet instead of the high-heeled, impractical footwear Vala so often favored. "I take it things didn't go well."

"Oh, it went perfectly well. A suitably large but distressingly _primitive_ ship arrived shortly thereafter. They sent a few people aboard my al'kesh, and I zatted them all before ringing aboard _their_ ship."

"'Zatted'?"

Vala grinned. "Apparently what they call getting shot by a zat'ni'katel."

"I like it."

"So do I. Anyway, I made my way through the ship, systematically shooting people and sending their unconscious bodies to the al'kesh. When I reached the control center, I didn't even have to shoot: they took one look at the big, bad Kell warrior and surrendered."

Sarilis fitted two pieces together, then wiped her grimy hands on a rag. "Then?" she prompted.

"Well, I _thought_ I had ringed everyone off the ship. Suddenly, I felt a kind of shockwave go through me."

"Come again? I thought the Kell suits were impervious to zat'ni'katel and staff blasts?"

"Oh, they are, but whatever weapon he used on me penetrated. It didn't really affect me any--'he' being the only person on the ship I hadn't managed to disable--but I was naturally concerned another shot might, so I zatted him, too. Of course by that time, I was already quite far away from the al'kesh, so I could _hardly_ turn around and drop him off with his friends."

"You kept a hostile alien on board?"

"Not an alien, Sarilis, a _human_. A quite handsome one, too, so I thought I'd keep him."

"I'm not surprised."

Vala sighed dramatically. "Too bad he didn't see things my way. I tied him to a chair, and when he woke up, he wasn't even scared of the big, bad Kell warrior. Seems he thought that weapon of his should have killed me--maybe it _does_ work on a _real_ Kell warrior--and wanted to know what I'd done with the rest of the crew." She giggled. "Actually, he did seem quite disturbed the big, bad Kell warrior thought he was attractive."

"Have you _looked_ at the groin armor on that thing?" Sarilis snorted.

"Good point. He figured out pretty quickly that I used to be a host--smart man, that one--and adamantly refused to help me in anyway. Fortunately, I was able to switch around a few control crystals in their engine room and re-write the command codes. Before I got to do anything else, though, my prisoner escaped and pointed a zat at me. I disarmed him, of course, and after some rather invigorating foreplay, I was able to knock him out."

Sarilis choked. "Foreplay?"

"Yes, we threw each other around for a while and I ended up kissing him before I was through. Turns out he wasn't completely out, though, and managed to get his zat back. I woke up in a cell, wearing these clothes. I have good reason to believe he was a perfect gentleman while I was naked, though I'm sure I wouldn't have done the same had our places been reversed."

"Vala!"

"Did I mention smart _and_ attractive?"

"Only once or twice."

"He was really quite sweet, actually. He fed me all the food I could eat and listened patiently to the little sob-story I fed _him_. Then he locked me back in the cell anyway."

"Yes, you did say he was smart."

"Sarilis!"

The shopkeeper grinned wickedly. "Yes, dear?"

"You're supposed to be on _my_ side," Vala pouted. "I'd already programmed the ship to meet Tennet, so all he could do was enjoy the ride. You see, my little tale was spun around a dramatic, noble deed: the rescue of an entire civilization from the hands of Ba'al. Once we'd landed, Mister Chivalry donned my Kell suit and went out to meet Tennet and his little henchman. Unfortunately, the Goa'uld ships in the system detected our arrival and started shooting."

She put her feet back on the floor. "Actually, that primitive ship took a considerable beating quite well before Daniel agreed to let me out of my cell so I could help him. We raised the shields and lifted off, trying to escape before we took too much damage, but ran into more gliders and al'kesh. Our shields were failing and we were about to take a _serious_ pounding, when his people showed up in the al'kesh I thought I'd left disabled and took out one of the enemy ships."

"Resourceful people."

"So it would seem. And just when I thought I knew how his mind worked, he zatted me again! Fortunately for me, the rest of his people weren't nearly as careful about keeping me safely confined. I managed to escape, ring back to the al'kesh, and make off with it. So here I am!"

"Glad you made it back okay," Sarilis said genuinely.

"Oh, me too. Is my stuff still upstairs? I _really_ need to slip into something more uncomfortable."

"Vala, my dear, you're the only tenant I have. So long as you continue to pay for the space, your belongings stay where they are." Sarilis picked up another component and began scraping corrosion off it.

"Thanks," Vala smiled. "Actually, Sarilis, the real reason I came to talk to you was for information. Have you ever heard of the Tau'ri?"

She dropped the component in shock. "The First World?"

"Ah, that's why the name seemed familiar! Now why would he mention _that_ old legend?"

"Vala, the Tau'ri aren't just a legend, they're _real_. Ra, Apophis, Sokar, Osiris... any of _those_ names familar to you?"

"Of course. They're all dead System Lords."

"They're all dead System Lords _killed by the Tau'ri_." Standing, Sarilis walked to the cabinet where she kept her old bounty hunting gear. Opening one drawer, she removed a small holographic displayer and carried it back to the worktable. "This is a Goa'uld bounty marker," she explained.

"Oh, please, Sarilis, I know what those are," Vala scoffed.

"But I bet you've never seen _this_." She pushed a button and the display came to life, projecting a string of Goa'uld symbols which basically translated to _WANTED DEAD or ALIVE_. "These are the Tau'ri," Sarilis explained. "The four whose pictures are contained in this marker are known as SG-1, and almost anything bad that's happened to any of the System Lords in the last decade can be attributed to them."

The first image was of gray-haired, handsome man, his left eyebrow bisected by a faint scar. _Colonel Jack O'Neill_, read the accompanying text, _former host to the Tok'ra dissident, Kanan. Known Tok'ra collaborator. Known member of the terrorist faction known as SG-1. Complicit in the deaths or defeat of Apophis, Cronus, Hathor, Marduk, Mot, Nirrti, Ra, Seth, and Sokar._ The reward listed caused Vala to straighten up eagerly.

"Keep in mind, this information is a few years old," Sarilis said casually. "I'm sure the bounty's gone up considerably since the Tau'ri killed Osiris and defeated Anubis."

She pressed the button again, and the image changed to a blond-haired, attractive woman. _Major Samantha Carter, former host to the Tok'ra dissident, Jolinar of Malkshur. Daughter of Jacob Carter, host to the Tok'ra dissident, Selmac. Known Tok'ra collaborator. Known member of the terrorist faction known as SG-1. Complicit in the deaths or defeat of Apophis, Cronus, Hathor, Marduk, Mot, Nirrti, Seth, and Sokar._ The bounty for the woman was equal to that of the man.

The next image was not of a human, but of a large, dark-skinned Jaffa. _Teal'c_, read the accompanying text, _former First Prime of Apophis._ Shol'va. _Leader of Jaffa rebellion. Known member of the terrorist faction known as SG-1. Complicit in the deaths or defeat of Ammaunet, Apophis, Cronus, Hathor, Marduk, Mot, Nirrti, Seth, and Sokar._ When the figures for the Jaffa finally appeared, Vala gasped.

"I could buy I new ha'tak for that!" she cried.

"Oh, it gets better," the former bounty hunter assured her, and pressed the button one last time. "This last one's worth at least _two_ ha'tak, the last I heard."

The final image was of a brown-haired, spectacled young man. _Daniel Jackson. Known Tok'ra collaborator. Known member of the terrorist faction known as SG-1. Complicit in the deaths or defeat of Ammaunet, Apophis, Hathor, Marduk, Ra, Seth, and Sokar._

Sarilis had the privilege of seeing something she thought she never would: Vala at loss for words. "Impressive rewards, aren't they?" she grinned.

"That's..." Vala sputtered.

"A bit confusing," Sarilis agreed, turning the marker off. "The one with the fewest System Lords to his name has the biggest reward! Apparently, Anubis and Osiris upped his price to twice that of the _shol'va_ over a year ago, making him more valuable than _any_ Tok'ra. He must've _really_ done something to make Anubis want him captured _that_ badly."

"That's _my_ Daniel!" the thief finally managed.

"_Your_ Daniel?" Her eyes widened in shock. "Holy fire, girl, you actually _captured_ Daniel Jackson?"

"I didn't know who he was!" Vala cried. "Well, actually, he _told_ me his name, but I certainly didn't think he was number one on the Goa'uld Most Wanted list! He seemed too... nice."

"Nice? The single most valuable bounty in the galaxy and you thought he was _nice_?" Sarilis shook her head in amusement. "It's a good thing I'm not in the business anymore, else I'd have you introduce us! Goa'uld bounties pay well when you actually _get_ paid, but getting a System Lord to keep a promise? Too dangerous for me, these days. Besides, what do I care if a few rebels overthrow the Goa'uld?"

"Can I have this?" Vala asked impulsively, picking up the marker.

Sarilis frowned in puzzlement, then as realization began to dawn on her, she smiled. "Sure. It's out of date, anyway." _But I bet that picture of 'your' Daniel is close enough to current_, she thought. _That girl has got it_ bad. She chuckled to herself, watching as the younger woman turned the marker back on and scrolled to the last image. _Vala Mal Duran, thief extraordinaire, has had her heart stolen by that handsome,_ nice _Tau'ri, Daniel Jackson!_

* * *

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	2. The Thwarting of the Thief

**The Thwarting of the Thief**

_"A great many men, who are sane and reasonable in other matters, allow themselves,  
on the slightest provocation, to be worked into a fever over the aspirations of women."_  
-- Robert Grant, _The Art of Living_

The cantina was noisy, dark, and filled with a number of disreputable individuals... just the way Yvondra Amicass liked it. As a dealer in information, she specialized in the shady, under-handed transactions that frequented a dive like this, and had pretty well made this particular establishment her home. Once her reputation had begun to grow, it wasn't uncommon for people to seek her out there. Comfortably resting in her favorite booth, she idly swished her drink while waiting for her client to arrive.

The former Lo'taur to Svarog had begun her career while still working for the false god. The position of 'most-trusted' servant to the powerful System Lord enabled her to overhear some of the best-kept secrets in the galaxy. Her beauty, brains, and quick thinking had done the rest, elevating her status in a very short time after her falling-out with Svarog.

Sometimes, people came to her seeking a specific bit of information, and if she didn't have it, they'd go elsewhere. Most of the time, though, the client would then commission her to "get" it. Once the information was collected, she'd contact the buyer and "deliver the goods". Some missions were fairly mundane, others were far from ordinary.

This one was one of the more interesting contracts. A fairly well-known thief and opportunist--and, curiously, one of the few people Yvondra would consider a friend--had requested information on a target who was both extremely easy _and_ astonishingly difficult to gain intelligence on, and was apparently not spoken of by any of the remaining System Lords directly. Then there was the intriguing little fact that Yvondra herself had once met the individual in question and not even known it! "Daniel Jackson," said the warrant on the marker, but she had known him by a different name. Her curiosity most definitely piqued, Yvondra agreed, not realizing at the time how difficult learning anything substantial would prove.

_Even if I _had_ known_, she thought to herself, _I'd probably have accepted, anyway. What a remarkable challenge!_ Then there was the obligation she had to fulfill to a certain _other_ client... but if all went well, that would take care of itself soon enough.

A sudden burst of whistles and cat-calls drew her attention to the door, where she witnessed Vala Mal Duran walk into the cantina wearing... Well, it was actually far easier to describe what she _wasn't_ wearing, as it left little to the imagination of even the most cerebrally under-developed creature in the room. Spotting Yvondra immediately, the dark-haired exhibitionist made her way through the bar and seated herself in the high-backed bench across the table.

"Hello, Yvondra," she practically purred. "Do you have a something nice for me?"

"Oh, I might. What are you looking for?"

"Hmmm... Well, that information you were supposed to collect for me, for starters."

"Oh, that," Yvondra smiled back, enjoying the game. "You know I can't work without the proper context, love. Why do you need _this_ little tidbit?"

"Because he's responsible for the Lucien fiasco, _love_," the thief replied equally. "I'd practically gift-packaged that ship and hand-delivered it, when _he_ decided not to give it up!"

"Oh, so _that_'s why--"

"Not that I blame him of course," Vala amended. "After all, it was his ship to begin with and I didn't _exactly_ request his permission. Still, I'd gone through all the trouble of arranging for Tenat O'Varan and his little goon to meet me with the naquadah, and _he_ messed up the trade!"

"Can't say that I blame him, either," Yvondra grinned, momentarily dropping the act. "So... did you use feminine wiles to charm him or did you simply knock him over the head?"

"Knocked him over the head, _then_ tried to seduce him. Neither worked. That man's as stubborn as a Tigorian _paktish!_" she pouted. One could never be sure if her sultry personality was an act or not, as it rarely wavered. Yvondra admired her for that. "Anyway, what's the latest from the War of the Lords?"

"Baal's wearing them all down," the broker answered. "Word is that Amateratsu's had half her armada wiped out by some mysterious force, which also seems to be giving Baal some trouble, too."

"The Jaffa Rebellion? The Tau'ri?"

"Not according to my source, but then again, the System Lords don't talk about the Tau'ri anyway. No, this new adversary is apparently some sort of anthropoid automaton."

"A mechanical bug? That's ridiculous."

"It sounded pretty far-fetched to me, too, but my source _is_ generally reliable... though easily distractible." Yvondra inhaled deeply, causing her bosom to strain against the fabric covering it.

Vala grinned wickedly, understanding the unspoken meaning quite well. "So... if the System Lords don't talk about the Tau'ri, how were you able to get information about my Daniel?"

The eavesdropper on the bench behind the broker twitched, but thankfully said nothing as Yvondra replied, "'Your' Daniel? You don't even know who he is, but you've taken up proprietorship already?"

"An entire _case_ of refined, weapons-grade naquadah, Yvondra, _that_'s what he cost me!" Vala cried, exasperated.

"So you think you'll be able to recoup your losses by turning him in for the reward? Hate to break it to you, love, but Osiris and Anubis are both dead. Collecting _that_ pay-off is impossible."

"Oh, I have no intention of trying to collect on the bounty. Let's just say, I plan to work out the payment arrangements... personally."

_In other terms_, thought Yvondra, _she intends to seduce him, then rob him blind_. It was Vala's standard ploy, and the gullible men of the galaxy still fell for it. "If you insist," she smiled knowingly.

"So? What can you tell me?"

"I can say with all honesty that I have never worked a contract that was both as easy _and_ as difficult to produce results as this one. You and this marker both say his name is 'Daniel Jackson', of the Tau'ri group known as SG-1. _I_ knew him as a Lo'taur, Jarren."

Vala twitched in her seat. "You _knew_ him? And you didn't tell me this because...?"

"Met him briefly, more like. Never actually talked to him."

"When? Where?"

Yvondra's brows rose. She hadn't seen Vala this genuinely interested in anything since... Well, was _anything_ ever genuine with her? "How much do you know about my past, love?"

"You were once the Lo'taur to Svarog, but had some sort of falling-out with him about three years ago," Vala replied with a careless shrug. "Really not much else, Yvondra, you _know_ personal details are _boring_ to me."

"Of course they are. Well, shortly before I escaped with Svarog's personal tel'tac, there was a summit of the System Lords. The meeting was called to discuss the rising threat of what we soon learned was Anubis, and was comprised of little more than petty bickering and baseless finger-pointing. Things took an interesting turn when Osiris invited herself, then proceeded to press for the re-instatement of Anubis among the System Lords."

"For all the good _that_ did. They ended up turning on the System Lords anyway," Vala pointed out.

"True, and that may be due in part to a sudden disruption which broke down the talks. Osiris disobeyed the rules of the summit by bringing a knife aboard, which she used to attack Yu Huang Shang-Ti after they'd gotten into a bit of a scrap. The real reason for the argument was never made clear to myself or any of the other servants aboard the station, but the rumor was that Osiris had taken a shine to Yu's Lo'taur and attempted to kidnap him for her own. He certainly hadn't looked the typical Lo'taur of choice for Yu, but I figured that the doddering old fool had merely shown uncharacteristically good taste when he'd selected Jarren."

"My Daniel was once Yu's Lo'taur?"

"You're interrupting, love."

"Sorry."

"While attempting to kidnap the supposed slave, Osiris found herself battling with Yu in the close confines of a cargo ship. The Lo'taur was shoved into an escape pod to get him out of the way, then accidentally ejected out into space. Presumably, no one sent a ship to recover the pod, as word had then gotten around that the Lo'taur in question was less-than-loyal to his master and may have actually _encouraged_ Osiris' attentions. Suddenly _all_ the Lo'taur at the summit came under close scrutiny, and half of the 'most-trusted' servants were put to death for their own indiscretions--including, ironically, the instigator of the rumor, Baal's Lo'taur. The rest of us either successfully proved our loyalties or jumped ship.

"I, of course, decided to leave while I still drew breath, thus starting my new career," Yvondra finished, tapping the table with her fingers. "Not a moment too soon, either, as Svarog met a grisly fate over the planet called Latona not long after. Still, I'm sure you can imagine my surprise when you walked up to me and requested information on the subject of an out-dated bounty marker, one who just happened to look _exactly_ like the missing Lo'taur!"

"My Daniel was once Yu's Lo'taur?"

"You're sounding like a faulty recording, love."

"I paid you an _extremely_ valuable data crystal for the information, Yvondra, stop playing games with me."

The broker leaned back in her own seat. "More valuable than that necklace you sold Inago, certainly."

"That was a priceless heirloom! And I still don't know what to do with that _worthless_ power coil he sold _me!_"

"I'm sure you'll manage. And the only thing 'extreme' about the crystal was the measures I had to go through to de-crypt the blasted thing." Not to mention the deal she'd had to make to get it done.

"It was worth it, wasn't it?"

"You're incorrigible." The thief flashed her a toothy grin in reply. "And yes, it did contain some intriguing information."

"I _knew_ it."

"And while I'm sure Arlos worked very hard on compiling all that research, he's not so besotted with you he _won't_ miss it any time soon. Or his mother's necklace."

"You forgot about the Goa'uld marriage bracelets, love. Those came from him, too," Vala replied haughtily, not even attempting to deny the theft.

Yvondra resisted the urge to smack her forehead. For a moment, she toyed with revealing the true nature of the ornate bands to her friend, then decided a certain someone listening in might be against it. Actually, getting her life bound to another's might actually do wonders to curb Vala's impulsive nature, so Yvondra was more than willing to go along with it. "Marriage bracelets, right."

"Now... My Daniel was once Yu's Lo'taur?"

_Like a courser with a coney_, Yvondra grinned. "I did some back-tracking. Turns out the _real_ Jarren was executed by order of Yu right around the same time as the summit, though it isn't known why. The 'Jarren' who was at the summit was one of the infamous, Not-To-Be-Spoken-Of-In-The-Presence-Of-A-System-Lord Tau'ri, lending greater credence to the rumors that Yu is far more sympathetic to the human rebels than is wise for a Goa'uld of his precarious position and mental health."

"Mental health?"

"He's senile, love, over five thousand years old and stays in one host for entirely too long at a time. The sarcophagus has eaten him alive."

"I see. But enough about Yu."

Yvondra huffed playfully. "And I thought you were my friend."

"What?" Vala cried. "I just said... Oh. Funny."

"Thanks, love."

"Daniel?"

"Right! Right after that, Osiris posted an increase in the bounty on his head, presumably because of what happened aboard the station. Then, just as suddenly, his bounty was removed from circulation."

"Someone caught him?"

"No, my source said he was killed in an accident on a planet called Langara. Big explosion, or something. One of the Langarans then filled his place on SG-1."

"Well, obviously he _wasn't_ killed," Vala pointed out, playing with her hair. "Another undercover operation?"

"My source either didn't know or refused to say. _Wherever_ he disappeared to, his reappearance a year later resulted in the reinstatement and drastic increase of the bounty offered for him to the oh-so-ridiculous sum you saw on that marker."

"Anything else? Do you know of any way I can contact him?"

"I've heard it said that the Tau'ri have some sort of shield over their Stargate, which can be removed only by sending a special coded signal through the open 'Gate. The codes and the devices used to send them are closely guarded by the Tau'ri and their allies," Yvondra explained. "Short of convincing the Tok'ra or the rebel Jaffa it's absolutely vital you see Jackson face to face, I don't see any way you're going to get through their shield."

"I could always take a ship."

"Let me refresh your recent Tau'ri knowledge a bit, love: seven years ago, Apophis attacked their world, Earth, with two ha'tak. Both were destroyed in orbit. Osiris disappeared when she returned to the planet on some grand, mysterious mission. Last year, Anubis and his entire fleet met the same fate. Do you _honestly_ think you can take a ship there?"

"Well, I could _try_."

Yvondra gaped. What happened to that infamous survival instinct which had kept the former Goa'uld host alive all this time? "What?"

"You're right, probably not a good idea, anyway," Vala mused, toying with the white streak in her hair again, oblivious to the reaction of her friend. "I have _no_ idea where to find him on their world."

"Right," the broker agreed, regaining her composure.

"Well? You haven't really given me anything I can work with, yet. What are his strengths and weaknesses? Anything I can properly take advantage of?"

"I _did_ say he was both easy _and_ difficult to find any information on. The easy part is hearing all about the exploits of the Tau'ri group called SG-1 and their four members. Which is now, by the way, three members. Apparently Colonel Jack O'Neill is now ranked 'General', and is the leader of their facility. The female's been promoted to Colonel, and now leads the team."

"Details, details."

"Exercise a bit of restraint, love, I don't do this for everyone, you know," Yvondra admonished.

"Y-_von_-dra..."

"And don't whine. It's unbecoming." She took a sip of her long-neglected drink, grimacing at the warmth. "Now, I have a source among the Tok'ra who I'm sure knew considerably more details than he was willing to discuss, nor could I properly entice further answers from him."

"You're _at least_ as good as I am, why not?"

"Because it's not polite to ask about another man when you're... otherwise occupied."

Vala grinned. "Right! A girl's gotta do--"

"--What a girl's gotta do. Something close to ten years ago, Daniel Jackson and Jack O'Neill blew up Ra's ship in orbit of the planet Abydos. O'Neill returned to their homeworld, but Jackson married the local princess and stayed behind."

"He's _married?_ Well, that'll make things more difficult, but it wouldn't be the first time I've--"

"Would you stop interrupting? Suddenly the single-most powerful Goa'uld out there, Apophis started casing Ra's territories, kidnapping slaves to make hosts for his offspring. One of those was Jackson's wife, who was chosen by Apophis' mate, Ammaunet."

"The poor man."

"Exactly. He never got her back, as she was apparently killed attempting to kill _him_ sometime later."

"Oh, that's tragic."

"It gets better. His brother-in-law was taken at the same time as his wife, and chosen by Klorel. The Tok'ra removed the symbiote from him sometime later, and did the same for the host of Osiris a year ago... apparently _she_ used to be a lover of his, and it may well have been her recognition of him at the summit that precipitated the fight with Yu." She smiled. "Don't you get it, Vala? You already have the capacity to exploit his single greatest weakness: you were once the victim of Goa'uld possession."

The thief looked very thoughtful. "Wouldn't be the first time I've used that to... open negotiations with someone. And there's really nothing more tragic than a widower bereft of a lady's company."

Yvondra chuckled. "One last thing: the Tok'ra rarely wanted anything to do with Tau'ri throughout the course of their alliance, but on a few occasions they deliberately sought out Jackson's expertise. It seems he speaks more than two dozen languages and has working knowledge of the cultures of half the galaxy's human population."

"Wow! All that _and_ a great a--ability to get himself into and out of trouble," Vala finished, but not before Yvondra heard the slip.

"More recently, though, he's come to be considered the galaxy's foremost expert on the race known as the Ancients," the broker finished, trying hard not to laugh outright. She had a pretty good idea what Vala had meant to say initially, and was now gaining a better understanding of her motives. "Supposedly, he can read, write, and speak the Ancients' language with ease."

"The Ancients? The original 'Gate builders? Now, _that_'s got to be worth something, at least. Maybe I can force him to translate an Ancient treasure map for me."

"Yes, I'm sure they've left riches just _lying_ around for you to find." Yvondra rolled her eyes. "That's all I have, love, unless you'd care to commission anything else."

"No, no, that should make a nice start," Vala assured her, removing a slim gold band from the pouch attached at her waist. "And if feminine wiles don't do the trick this time, either, my bracelets should provide sufficient motivation."

_Not in the way you think_, Yvondra thought to herself, easily imagining the reluctant Tau'ri's response to being tethered to the amorous thief. "I guess they might. Take care, Vala. Don't try to steal anything you can't carry."

"Actually, he was the one who carried _me_ when I-- I mean, thanks Yvondra. I'll do my best." She rose from the booth, stretching dramatically for the benefit of all the male eyes in the room, then departed.

Yvondra sighed, turning to the hooded figure seated in the booth behind her own. "Turnabouts really _are_ fair play. I think she's got a taste of what all the hapless hearts she's broken across this galaxy are feeling."

"It's certainly what she deserves," agreed Arlos wistfully. "I already feel sorry for the young man she's after."

So did she, but mentally wished them both well. "Our deal is concluded, Arlos. Is there anything else?" she asked.

"Just one more thing, my dear: help Vala find a suitable Ancient treasure map. The sooner she gets herself stuck to the poor Tau'ri, the better."

* * *

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	3. The Thaumaturgy of the Thief

Rating: Teens  
Genre: General, Humor, Missing Scene/Epilogue  
Warnings: Mild swearing, mild innuendo.  
Episodes: Takes place during "Reckoning, Part II". Contains major spoilers for "Avalon" and "The Ties That Bind". Minor ones for "The Devil You Know", "Last Stand", "New Order", and numerous others of various seasons.  
Synopsis: Sequel to "The Thwarting of the Thief". Vala's quest to catch "her" Daniel continues.  
Notes: The idea for this series came from watching "Avalon" and wondering how Vala got from having supposedly 'not heard of' the Tau'ri, to knowing just exactly where and how to contact Daniel, and just what the perfect bait was.

* * *

**The Thaumaturgy of the Thief**

"_The right word spoken at the right time sometimes achieves miracles_."

-- Josef Goebbels, _The Goebbels Diaries_

Caius Orellius considered himself a simple man with simple tastes. He had no desire for extravagant clothing, exotic women, or lush estates.

But this was _ridiculous_.

The blasted monks of the false god Grannus led lives so simple, it was best described as "impoverished". Day in, day out, they wore the same scratchy robes, chanted the same repetitive prayers, ate the same bland food... and were pathetically _satisfied_ about it! After a single _day_ of the endless nonsense, he was ready to scream.

Sadly, though, there was no escape from his current predicament. A "property dispute" with the powerful System Lord Baal had brought his smuggling and pirating days to a screeching halt, forcing Caius to go into hiding. What better place to do that than to find religion? Grannus had pledged his fealty to Baal after the death of his former lord, Cammulus, thus making one of his worlds the perfect place to hide from the Jaffa of Baal.

Some of the strain of living at the shrine was eased once he learned the offerings made to the so-called sun god were left lying about until Grannus sent a servant to collect them. Caius began helping himself to the gifts, and soon had a very nice collection of riches stashed away in his personal cargo ship off-world. For the moment, however, he was reduced to merely hiding from Baal.

So there he was, weeding the garden less than a month into his self-imposed exile, and was tending the flowers by the "Eye of the Sun" when the chevrons began to engage. Startled, he leapt back from the Stargate, glancing around to see if any monks or pilgrims were in the immediate vicinity. No one was, which left him in the very vulnerable position of greeting whomever came through the event horizon.

The portal opened and a single, slim figure with a big round bag slung over her shoulder stepped through, a grin crossing her features as she noted Caius. Her form-fitting clothing flattered every curve, providing the smuggler with a view of a valley so deep, it nearly gave him vertigo. Much as he enjoyed the vista, others could have heard the activation of the Stargate and could already be on their way.

"Sister Vesina," he muttered between clenched teeth, "you're not properly attired for this kind of weather."

"I don't know, Brother Caius," she answered casually, "the air feels warm enough to me. A little too warm, actually. Would you help me remove--"

"Do you _mind?_" he hissed, nervously glancing down the path toward the monastery.

"Relax, I've got my robe right here," Vala Mal Duran assured him, reaching into the over-sized carrier and withdrawing a simple gray habit. Pulling it over her head, and straightening it on her shoulders, she was finally covered from head-to-toe. "Is that better?"

"Much," the smuggler breathed in relief, just as a pair of monks rounded a bend in the garden. "Blessed day!" he called in greeting as the men walked by.

"Blessed day," the monks echoed, then were out of sight.

"Thank Grannus," Caius sighed, relieved Vala--and by extension, himself--hadn't been caught. "Well, Sister, how are the orphans?"

Vala picked up her bag again, a frown creasing her striking features. "It's complicated. They started fighting their bedtime about a week ago, but things have gotten _really_ nasty in the last few days. There seems to be no end in sight. Several of the orphans have broken all their toys, and they'll probably all go without supper before this is through."

Caius grabbed her arm and pulled her off the side of the path, safely concealing them behind a stand of flowering bushes. "What in the name of all that's holy did _that_ mean?"

"I'm not the idiot who came up with that ridiculous code!" she retorted. "Asking about the 'orphans' to find out if Baal's still pissed off at you?"

"A simple 'well' or 'poorly' would have sufficed!"

"Well, a simple answer wouldn't have done the _real_ situation any good! Yes, Baal's still out to get you, but the whole galaxy's been turned upside-down in the last week! Some sort of creatures called the 'Replicators' have been systematically destroying or taking over every Goa'uld ship in the galaxy, sweeping their way across whole domains like cicadas on crops."

"What?"

"I told you it was complicated," Vala huffed. "The System Lords are being wiped out, one by one."

"Hellfire," Caius breathed, sitting down on a convenient rock. "And you say there's no end in sight?"

"Well, there is... but it's probably the kind of end where the Replicators destroy everything, and there's no one left to care, anyway." She twisted her lips into a wry smile. "Well, nothing left but people who know how to fend for themselves _without_ the protection of a 'god'."

_I know that smile_, the smuggler moaned inwardly. It was the first visible sign that the beautiful thief had some wild scheme in mind... though one could be reasonably certain she _always_ had something nefarious planned. "What's in the bag?" he asked, forcing himself to remain composed.

"A little artifact I've chosen to gift to the shrine," she replied cryptically. "I was here earlier, but you weren't, so I thought I'd wait until I could give it to you personally."

"Give what?"

"A sign from Grannus! I've located the elusive Ring of Shen-Marak." She reached into the bag and withdrew--

"A power coil? Hellfire, Vala, that's no 'artifact'!"

Vala shrugged. "Yes, but how many of the devout pilgrims who donate their worldly goods to the shrine actually know that?"

"I think tha... uh, what?" How did she know about his current racket?

"Oh, come off it, Caius. I _know_ you."

_That_, the pirate thought, _is exactly the problem._ "The Ring of Shen-Marak, eh? Well, what does 'Sister Vesina' get out of it? And don't tell me 'nothing', either. _I_ know _you_."

"Fine." Vala propped her elbow up on a stone plinth. "I've recently learned of an artifact which could lead me to the catch of the millennium."

"The catch of the millennium was Aris Boch's capture of Ehmerid of Constasis. And since when did _you_ become a bounty hunter?"

Vala looked smug. "That was _last_ millennium, according to the calendar of Ra. It's a 'new' millennium and not all 'catches' are turned in for their bounty. No, this 'catch' could very well lead me to--_be_ the treasure of the Ancients."

Caius puzzled over the correction briefly, before dismissing it as inconsequential. "What do you need from me, then?"

"I need to know how to work some of the 'special upgrades' to your cargo ship."

"You came all this way to ask me if you can borrow my ship? No, no! You can just take your useless power coil and leave, Vala! You're great on 'borrowing' but _not_-so-great at the giving-back-in-one-piece-when-finished part."

"I didn't come all this way to ask you if I could _borrow_ your ship," Vala sighed with a dramatic eye-roll. "I've _already_ borrowed it. Now what I _need_ is to make sure I can get where I'm going without getting caught."

"You _what!_"

"That robe must be affecting your hearing."

"My hearing's fine!" Caius sputtered. _Oh, hellfire, does she know about the 'offerings' stashed aboard?_

"Um-hmmm..." Vala gave him a quick once-over. "Anyway, the place I need to go is deep in Lucien Alliance territory."

"And the Alliance cares for you about as much as Baal does for me," the smuggler finished, burying his face in his hands. "This 'catch' had better be worth it, Vala. I expect twenty-percent."

"I'm sure he--_it_ will be. Five percent of the treasure."

"Fifteen."

"Ten."

"Deal."

"Deal." She flashed him an impudent grin. "Ten percent of _my _share, that is. Of course, I'm sure I'll have to split the treasure with the tablet's interpreter..."

"You're an evil woman, Vala." _One of these years, I'm gonna get one up on her_, he sighed to himself.

"No, I'm not!" she protested. "Resourceful, intelligent, seductively beautiful, yes, but not evil."

"Not to mention treacherous and deceitful."

The thief smiled seductively. "Flattery won't get you a larger percentage." She straightened. "Now. About those modifications..."

Caius sighed and quickly explained the holographic and pulse-wave technologies he'd installed on his cargo ship to fool sensors and disable enemy ships. "That combined with the standard cloaking shield should be all you need," he finished.

"And that's it?"

"That should be all you need," he reiterated.

"But what if I--"

"Vala, if you get my ship into a situation where neither one of those tricks will help you, I will personally send you to Sokar!"

"Hate to break it to you, Caius, but Sokar's dead."

"My point exactly."

"All right!" she cried. "I'll bring your ship back, as soon as--" She was interrupted by the sound of the Stargate activating. The approached the edge of the clearing, peering expectantly at the event horizon. "Grannus due back?"

Caius swallowed. "He is not expected for weeks. Perhaps more pilgrims?"

Suddenly a vibrant blue shockwave emerged from the 'Gate, sweeping upward and outward, surging past the surprised pair. "_Not_ Grannus," Vala muttered, shuddering a bit.

"Some kind of weapon? Scanning device?"

"I don't know," she answered, still unsettled. "Whatever it was, it was _big_."

"Well, yeah. Did you see how it expanded when--"

"That's not what I meant." Her expression was closed. "I've felt like this before. Qetesh always thought my 'feelings of doom' meant nothing until one preceded the rebellion of her slaves against her. The _last_ time I felt something like this, was shortly before Anubis revealed himself as the new dominant force in the galaxy. As I said, Caius, this is _big_. Cosmically big."

The 'Gate shut off, the sound of running feet echoing in the absence of the wormhole's roar. "Brother Caius! Sister Vesina!" Abbot Marcus gasped, accompanied by two equally breathless monks. "What has transpired?"

Vala smiled with undue cheer. "A sign from Grannus! My sisters and I have recovered the Ring of Shen-Marak!" She grabbed the power coil and spun about, holding it up like the precious relic she was passing it off as.

"Thanks be to Grannus!" the abbot cried, reaching out to touch the object reverently. "It shall have a place of honor next to the sacred Livanna Crystal!" Then the odd little troupe of abbot, monks, smuggler, and thief made their way to the stone pillar upon which the relic was perched.

It wasn't there.

"The Livanna Crystal has vanished!" one of the monks cried.

Caius glared suspiciously at Vala. "A sign from Grannus!" she exclaimed again.

* * *

Author's Notes 

Thaumaturgy (n.) - the performance of miracles

This one takes a bit more serious a turn, revealing just a hint of the more serious side of Vala recently seen in "The Powers That Be". (But believe me when I say it's hard to write Vala trying to pretend to be a nun!)

Big thanks go to Loethaelis for the cookies, Morgann for the chocolate, and Pentagon Merlin for the roses!


	4. The Thelemity of the Thief

The Thelemity of the Thief  
by Cleo the Muse

* * *

The Thelemity of the Thief

"Thieves respect property. They merely wish the property to

become _their_ property that they may more perfectly respect it."

-- G. K. Chesterton, _The Man who was Thursday_

"It's not just any crystal," a woman argued exasperatedly. "It's a priceless relic held in high regard by the worshippers of Grannus."

_I know that voice,_ thought Benitar of Dak Sheb, pausing mid-step on his way through the crowded bazaar to meet the client of his mate, Yvondra Amicass.

_:Yes, you do:_ agreed Mektil. _:Shall we rescue whomever she's trying to swindle:_

"Well, maybe _they'd_ like to have it," a male voice replied haughtily. "It's worthless. Our collection comprises only the finest in the sacred artifacts of Baal... Grannus is not fit to kiss the feet of Lord Baal."

"Why would he want to?" she huffed irritably.

"More importantly, how _could_ he?" added Benitar, recognizing both the dark-haired thief and the local museum curator. "Grannus is dead."

Vala Mal Duran's face stretched into a wide grin. "Benitar!"

"Vala," the short, blond-haired man answered with a smile. "Master Curator, you've always known me to be a reliable source of information..."

"Of course," the curator replied, giving Vala a very disdainful look that lingered a bit over-long on her poorly concealed curves. "Grannus has been slain? Our Lord Baal doubtlessly removed the upstart."

"Actually, he was killed by his own Jaffa. The Jaffa Rebellion recently attacked and took control of Dakara from Baal, who was himself engaged in battle with a formidable enemy known as the Replicators," he began, smiling wickedly at Vala.

"No doubt Baal defeated his foe and crushed the rebels!"

"Actually, a Tok'ra, a Tau'ri, and the rebels defeated the foe _and_ Baal. Word is the Jaffa are planning to build a new nation with its capitol at Dakara, and Baal has disappeared. When news of his defeat reached Grannus' own Jaffa, they took the liberty of removing their own master themselves."

"Blasphemer!" the curator gasped, turning heel and stalking off into the throng.

"Well, so much for _that_ sale," Vala sighed, re-adjusting the strap of the bag she carried over her shoulder. "Thank you _so_ very much!"

"You are welcome," he grinned in reply, then raised an arm in the direction of a quiet café. "Giving that sort of news sure felt good."

"I'm sure it did," she replied dryly. "So a Tok'ra, a Tau'ri, and the rebels? Which Tau'ri?"

"Since when do you care?" The last time he'd talked to Vala, she had cared very little at all to hear of the current state of affairs, much less any of the more prominent resistance groups.

"Since I met one of them and was impassioned by their cause."

Benitar's eyebrows shot up. "Impassioned?"

"Absolutely."

_:Sure she was.:_

"Right. Didn't care for them any more than you did for us, right?"

"All that boring rhetoric," she agreed. "Details, Benitar!"

"The Tau'ri was Samantha Carter of SG-1, daughter of Selmak's host, Jacob."

"Oh." She made her way to a table in a darkened corner and seated herself in a chair. "Why just one member of SG-1? Where were the other two? The Jaffa and the hand--y linguist?"

_Handy linguist?_ It was true, the Tok'ra _had_ found the archaeologist's linguistic abilities useful a time or two, but--

_:She meant to say 'handsome':_ Mektil interrupted in silent amusement. _:I believe Yvondra is correct about her. She is, indeed, 'gone'. But then again, so is he... in an entirely different way.:_

_Quiet, you,_ Benitar told his symbiote. Aloud, he said, "The Jaffa Teal'c was fighting alongside his brethren in orbit of Dakara itself. Doctor Jackson was... engaged elsewhere, and couldn't be reached to assist in the translation."

Vala raised a curious eyebrow. "More undercover work for the Tok'ra?"

"No. As you might know, the relationship between the Tok'ra and the Tau'ri has become strained of late." He paused, and Mektil took over.

:The Tok'ra have long thrived on secrecy and subterfuge to accomplish our ways. The Tau'ri are much more direct. It is a difference which has long caused tension between our peoples, and it was for that reason our formal alliance was dissolved. The Tau'ri stopped trusting us and became more demanding of our increasingly limited resources.:

"More likely, they wanted you to share even a tiny bit and you wouldn't do it," she smirked, twisting in her seat, "Tok'ra generosity being what it is. Now you're jealous of their accomplishments."

:Jealousy is not a factor: Mektil promised, Benitar's fair skin flushing uncomfortably.

"Sure it's not." Vala drew herself across the table toward him. "You can't stand it that the Asguard like to give them big guns and engines and won't give you the time of day! I've seen their ship, the _Prometheus_. Pretty impressive for a bunch of _primitive_ humans, wouldn't you say?" She batted her eyes at him for a moment before slowly sliding back to her seat. "Now, where's my tablet?"

_Ease yourself,_ Benitar told the flustered symbiote, clearing his throat and unconsciously stroking a hand over the breast pocket of his tunic. "It is in the possession of a historian and scientist who has apparently been working on it for four years or more. He recently told one of our scientists, Anise, that he had deciphered the code in which it was written _and _translated it word-for-word, but was unable to understand it in context."

"Since when did the Ancients start writing things in code? The language itself looks pretty incomprehensible to me _without_ mixing it all up."

:Apparently only the most important documents are written in code: Mektil explained. :The Ancient weapon at Dakara, the one which destroyed the Replicators galaxy-wide, was guarded by a mechanism which was cleverly encoded.:

"So this tablet's _got _to lead to something good." She began to play with a strand of hair. "Go on, tell me where to find this 'historian and scientist'."

Benitar shook his head. "It's not that simple. If I tell you where it is, _you_ have to promise the Tok'ra will get a chance at the translation before you take it anywhere else."

"Here's _my_ translation: You think the tablet might lead to another technological treasure like the Ancient weapon at Dakara--which, I presume, is now in the hands of the Jaffa? You want a crack at it before someone _else_--the Tau'ri, for example--gets control of the technology and you can't even touch it." She released her hair with a flick of her wrist. "Am I right? I am, aren't I?"

:You are correct: Mektil grudgingly agreed:but not for the reasons you believe. The Tok'ra wish to retrieve this 'treasure' before it falls into the hands of someone who will misuse it.:

"I've heard _that_ one before. And who better to misuse it than yourselves?" She leaned across the table once more. "Tell you what... I'll trade you the Livanna Crystal for the location of the tablet."

"The Livanna Crystal is a worthless relic," Benitar began, guessing that this was what she had been attempting to sell to the hapless museum curator. He was shushed by his symbiote.

:The tablet will do you no good without a proper translation: Mektil responded. :The Tok'ra have thousands of years of knowledge and expertise to draw upon. You will find it difficult to find anyone who has the means to translate and interpret the information better than us.:

Vala rolled her eyes and stared up at the ceiling. "No, I don't think so. In fact, I know just the man for the job. So do you, I think, as doubtlessly the Tok'ra would eventually run to the Tau'ri for assistance... as you have so often done in the past, I'm told. Maybe I'll just eliminate the middle-man... You."

_Don't do it, Mektil_, Benitar begged, but to no avail.

:Doctor Jackson was killed in the Replicator attack.:

The thief shot to her feet. "_What?_"

:That is why he could not be reached. He was captured by the Replicators and is believed to have perished nearly two weeks ago when the weapon disintegrated the ship he was imprisoned aboard. The Tau'ri believe he is still out there, but the Tok'ra are not given to such foolish sentiment.: He ignored Benitar's protests and rose to stare at the tall woman as close to eye-to-eye as he could get. :The Tok'ra really _are_ the best chance you have of deciphering the tablet, Vala.:

"No," Vala answered emphatically. "If _I_ don't get it translated _my_ way, _nobody_ gets a piece of the treasure. Got it?" She crossed her arms in defiance. "And I'm quite certain he's been reported dead before. For nearly a year, once, wasn't it? Why don't you _Tok'ra_ trust the _Tau'ri_ a bit more?" At the embarrassed surprise darkening the Tok'ra's face, she stepped closer, running her fingers up his chest before entwining them behind his neck. "The Livanna Crystal for the information, Mektil. Take it or leave it." With a coquettish smile, she picked up her bag, turned around, and exited the café.

_What is this Livanna Crystal?_ Benitar asked his symbiote.

_:A relic held in reverence by the worshippers of Grannus:_ Mektil explained. _:A religious artifact to his human slaves, it is actually an information crystal believed to possess Grannus' notes on the many uses of solar energy in warfare, research he was forced to abandon when his domain was conquered by Cammulus.:_

_So... valuable?_

_:Extremely.:_

_Shouldn't we trade the information we have on the Ancient tablet for it, then?_ he asked, fingers reaching reassuringly to the hidden pocket once more.

The pocket was empty.

_:After her:_

Benitar bolted out of the café, glancing in each direction for the raven-haired pickpocket. "She's gone!" he yelped aloud.

_:The Stargate is closely guarded by the Lucien Alliance. She came by ship, remember:_

"Right." He took off in the direction his own ship's sensors had indicated another tel'tac had been landed, dodging the citizens milling about in the bazaar. He had reached the edge of the crowd and was about to make a turn down one lane when he heard angry voices coming from a nearby alley.

"Jup has already commandeered your ship and is waiting to take us back to the Alliance fleet!" a harshly-accented voice shouted.

"Jup barely has command of his own bodily functions, let alone an entire ship," responded the familiar nonchalance of Vala. "What say you let me go, and I don't rip off any extra appendages?"

Benitar and Mektil peered cautiously around the corner, taking in the sight of a rather ugly, tentacled being pointing a weapon at the beautiful thief. "Where is your partner?" the mercenary demanded, shaking his gun for emphasis.

"Partner? I don't have a partner, Tenat, you _know_ I work alone." Her expression didn't change, but her eyes met Benitar's and silently demanded, _Help me out, here!_

"The one who calls himself Olo! He is the one responsible for--unh!" Tenat groaned in agony as a zat'nik'tel blast sent him twitching into unconsciousness.

"It's about time!" Vala exclaimed, stepping on the mercenary as she made her way toward Benitar, which elicited a soft groan from the fallen alien. "What took you so long?"

:The tablet: Mektil demanded.

"So you've decided to tell me where it is, then? Very well, I'm listening."

:Not _that_ tablet. The one you stole from us.:

She pouted. "Stole? Mektil, I may not have the best reputation, but how dare you imply I stole something from you?" Benitar grabbed her satchel and opened one pocket, pulling out a Goa'uld record device. "Oh, _that_ tablet."

:It doesn't do you much good without this specially programmed decoder: Mektil smirked, withdrawing the smooth black stone from his belt pouch.

"Oh. Right. Well, my offer still stands," she grinned.

_Just give it to her, _Benitar admonished. _Whether Doctor Jackson's dead or not, she won't be able to do anything with the Ancient tablet by herself, even if she _is_ able to get it away from its current owner._

:Very well: Mektil agreed, handing the tablet and the stone over to the thief and accepting the satchel in return. He inspected its contents before nodding in agreement. :As a show of my 'Tok'ra generosity', I also promise to see you safely off this planet.:

"I have a ship," she protested.

:Not according to that mercenary, you don't: he reminded her.

"Right. Well then, in that case, I accept."

Together, the Tok'ra and the thief made their way toward the Stargate, Benitar quickly stunning both guards with his zat'nik'tel. "Hurry, Vala, others will have heard."

"Thank you, Benitar," she smiled, hugging him closely. "Give Yvondra my best." She turned and ran toward the dialing device, punching the symbols quickly. When the wormhole had stabilized, she gave him a little wave and ran for the event horizon.

Sudden suspicion caused Benitar to reach into the bag on his shoulder, his hand meeting only fabric. _:Stop her, she has the crystal:_ Mektil cried. But Vala was already gone, and the Livanna Crystal with her.

"We'll meet again," Benitar vowed, chuckling.

* * *

Author's Notes

Thelemity (n.) - the state of doing as one pleases (derived from thelemite, a _person_ who does what he/she pleases)

Amazing what a little power outage can do to a story! Having just re-watched "The Powers That Be", my initial version of this story was far more serious than anything previously, reflecting the far more serious Vala of that episode. Then a lightning storm briefly knocked out power, and when I rebooted my computer, I learned I had lost more than _half_ of this chapter!

Fortunately, the second version turned out better than the first.

Big thanks to all those who've made my day(s) by submitting a review or sending an email! This one's a bit longer AND a bit early, just for you. (Now don't you feel special?)


	5. The Thoroughness of the Thief

**The Thoroughness of the Thief  
**by Cleo the Muse

"_How bold one gets when one is sure of being loved!_"  
-- Sigmund Freud, _The Letters of Sigmund Freud_

"I expected you to be on the other side of the galaxy by now, love," Yvondra Amicass grinned, appreciatively eyeing the tight leather bodice her friend had managed to pour her not-inconsiderable upper torso into. She just _had_ to get one of those for herself.

"Bad news travels fast, does it?" Vala Mal Doran smirked, languidly stretching out in the booth opposite the information broker. "Actually, I _would_ be there already, if I didn't need a little something from _you_, first."

The former lo'taur of Svarog feigned innocence. "From me? Oh, Vala, what could you _possibly_ need from me?"

Vala leaned forward and rested her chin on her hand. "I'm sure there's something."

"A treasure map?"

"Got one of those."

"A valuable information crystal?"

"I think I know where one of those could be."

"A perfectly salvageable Goa'uld ha'tak?"

Vala straightened up. "Really?"

"Fresh out, sorry." Yvondra smiled wickedly at the answering sullen pout, continuing to count suggestions off on her fingers. "Let's see... Goa'uld marriage bracelets?"

"Already own a pair."

"Access codes to the Tau'ri Stargate?"

Vala leaned back, imperiously flipping one hand in Yvondra's direction. "I think that's what I'm looking for."

"Sorry, love, those codes are as preciously guarded as the cats in Bastet's palace."

The thief crossed her arms. "I can't believe I came all the way here just to find out--"

Yvondra waved a hand. "I _might_ know another way through their 'Gate, if you're willing to listen."

"How much does 'willing' cost me this time?"

The broker steepled her fingers together, leaning across the table conspiratorially. "Well, the Tok'ra have expressed an interest in a rare object known only as the Livanna Crystal. I don't suppose you've heard of it have you?"

"I may have heard it mentioned before," Vala replied, looking thoughtful as she tapped her chin with her forefinger. "Something to do with solar energy? A prism, maybe?"

"Might be," Yvondra replied. "Whatever it is, they sounded like they _really_ wanted it."

"Well, maybe I can find out where this crystal might be. In the meantime, what news from the War of the Lords?"

"Not the 'War of the Lords' any longer, love. More like the 'Bore of the Hordes'. The Jaffa are trying to found a new nation, the Tau'ri have been curiously quiet, and the Tok'ra are looking to undermine everyone and turn the whole galaxy into a morass of political intrigue. Certain brave fellows are attempting to found their own dynasties; the Lucien Alliance has swelled their ranks with disillusioned Jaffa and their respective al'kesh; and the remaining Goa'uld are either dead, out of power, or too stupid to realize the Jaffa they once commanded have actually taken charge of their affairs for them." She paused, angling her head to one side curiously. "Have you been out of the loop, love?"

Vala gave a very un-ladylike snort. "'Out of the loop'? You might say that. You might also say I've spent the better part of the last two months kow-towing to every whim and whiny request from an idiot archaeologist who should've been shot several years ago."

_Ouch_, Yvondra thought, eyes widening in surprise at the vehemence in her friend's tone. _Things must not have gone too well_. Rather than directly asking, though, she asked, "So what's the last bit of news you'd heard?"

"That the Jaffa Rebellion had defeated the armada of Baal in orbit of Dakara."

"Well, the rebel Jaffa forced Baal to flee, then went after Anubis. Turns out, Anubis was going after the weapon at Dakara at the same time, and they passed by one another going. Just as the weapon was about to fire, eyewitnesses reported that Anubis threw up his hands as though warding off an invisible attacker and vanished in a flash of blinding light."

"Ring transporter? Asguard beam?"

"Neither. He left all his clothing behind when he disappeared."

"Ew."

Yvondra looked amused. "It's not what you're thinking, love."

"I wasn't thinking anything."

"Right. Some of the Jaffa took it as a spiritual sign that the Goa'uld reign was ended, and declared themselves freed by the powers of the 'true gods'."

"What do those not prone to delusions think?"

The broker leaned closer. "That your fiancé did it."

"Fiancé? Oh, you mean Daniel. He's not my--"

"Have you or have you not been packing those 'marriage bracelets' around for a few months, intending to use them on a certain unwitting Tau'ri?"

"Well, when you put it _that_ way... And what do mean, my Daniel did it?"

"When you last saw him, Benitar oh-so-diplomatically told you Jackson had been reported killed in action, correct?"

"It was Mektil actually, and as I recall, I told him what a _ridiculous_ assumption _that_ was," Vala replied haughtily. "He wasn't really dead, was he?"

"Actually, he was, love." Yvondra let it sink in for a moment before she decided to stop Vala's inevitable outraged sulk by saying, "Of course, the key word is 'was'. 'Was' dead."

"Then he wasn't disintegrated along with the Replicator ship."

"No, it seems more likely he went extra-vehicular without a protective suit."

"Ew!"

"Definitely. The Tok'ra really don't know what happened, actually--though they have their suspicions--nor are the Tau'ri being very forthcoming with specifics."

Vala frowned. "I thought the Tau'ri loved extolling their victories to the known universe. Leastwise, that's what the Tok'ra have led me to believe."

Yvondra gave a short bark of laughter. "I wouldn't say 'extolling'. They've never denied any of the claims of victory attributed to them by the Tok'ra tendency to overstate everything else." She looked thoughtful for a moment. "I suppose that's probably because any bragging about their victories would probably have made them a higher-priority target to the System Lords."

"Yes, probably. But you're getting off-track." The thief reached one hand up to play with a strand of hair dangling free from the clip which held the rest off her neck. "What do you mean, my Daniel did it?"

_Ah, that famous Mal Doran persistence!_ Yvondra chuckled to herself. "Jackson was conspicuously absent during the battles with the Replicators and Baal. Then, just after Anubis' disappearance two weeks later, Jackson reappeared without a scratch. Coincidence? The Tok'ra don't think so."

Vala arched an eyebrow. "Even a sarcophagus won't revive a person dead for that long."

"Exactly why the Tok'ra are suspicious, love. Of course, no one would tell me what their suspicions _were_, but I got the impression the Tau'ri didn't deny it."

"Interesting."

Yvondra grinned. "Isn't it, though?" She steepled her hands together on the table before her. "Now... What have _you_ been up to these last two months?"

"Not much," Vala admitted. "I 'Gated to the address Benitar provided, only to find out the man who had the tablet was a widowed archaeologist _obsessed_ with the Ancients."

The broker choked. "That sounds familiar," she remarked with a grin.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing."

"Anyway, the archaeologist--Malikai was his name--had apparently been expecting the Tok'ra to send a research assistant for some time already, which _Benitar_ failed to mention. I spent two months digging in the dirt with instruments too small to make effective eating implements! I had to label every broken tool, every pottery shard, every _rock_ I dug up and precisely notate its location on a sheet of paper!"

_Oh, Vala, to have to exercise such patience!_ Yvondra laughed to herself. "So what took you so long? Surely it didn't take you two months to find the tablet."

"Oh, getting _to_ the tablet wasn't hard at all," Vala assured her. "Getting the cipher to decode the damn thing took a _lot_ longer. After about a month he finally stopped talking about his dead wife long enough to say he thought the tablet placed the treasure on Earth."

"Really? What a coincidence."

"Isn't it though? Anyway, a month later he _finally_ stopped talking about the dig long enough to tell me how to decode the dumb thing. That night, I took it and ran!"

"You poor thing," the former lo'taur laughed. "I'm sorry you had such a hard time."

"Well, I tried to shorten things a bit, really. He was quiet and polite at first, so I played 'hard to get', then 'dangerously seductive' when that didn't seem to work. Even still, I think the only way he'd have looked at me twice was if I'd looked just like his dead wife." She pursed her lips contemplatively. "In retrospect, I probably should have covered my body in Ancient writing: maybe _then_ Malikai would have noticed I was female."

_Oh, _there_'s an image,_ Yvondra grinned, not having any difficulty imagining just that. "In the end, you still got what you set out to get."

Vala wagged a finger. "Not everything. How do I get through the Tau'ri Stargate to retrieve my Daniel? So I can get my treasure, of course."

"Oh, of course, love... But I still need the Livanna Crystal."

The thief heaved a martyred sigh, reaching down the top of her bodice and removing an orange data crystal from its well-cushioned resting place. She slid it across the table and sat back, crossing her arms. "This treasure had better be worth it," she pouted sulkily.

The broker tucked the crystal into the pocket of her vest, simultaneously retrieving a disc-shaped crystal of her own. Six symbols were etched across the surface. "The 'Gate address to a world the Tau'ri call Alpha Site. From there you should be able to convince them to contact Jackson. Of course you'll have to convince _him_ you need to go to Earth."

"That's a lot of indefinites."

Yvondra spread her hands. "It's the best I could do, love. Like I said before, the Tau'ri have been strangely quiet since the defeats of the Replicators, Baal, and Anubis. Even the Tok'ra have had their last major tie to the Tau'ri severed when Selmak and his host, Jacob Carter, died. Still, the Tau'ri maintain the Alpha Site as an off-world outpost whereby you might gain access to the Tau'ri 'Gate." She pointed at the disc. "Memorize those symbols well, as the crystal will shatter when it goes through the event horizon."

"I'll keep that in mind," Vala promised, standing.

"You do that." She stood as well, walking to the door with her friend. Placing a hand on each of Vala's shoulders as they stood just outside the entryway, she smiled. "Vala... good luck. May you get what you're after."

"Oh, I will certainly do my best."

Yvondra then waited until Vala was almost around the corner before she called, "Vala!"

"What?"

"Apparently his first wife was _given_ to him. _Don't_ play 'hard to get', all right?"

An impish grin was her only reply.

* * *

Author's Notes: 

And there ya have it, Ladies and Gents! The very last "The Thief" story before "Avalon". I may need a bit of a brain-break before plunging into the season nine stories, but hopefully it won't take too long.

As for the Convention, I "innocently" explained to Chris Judge and Michael Shanks that it was my first convention ever, and that I had been told I should ask about "something called the Puff and Ruffle"! Oh, the groans of agony those two made before standing up and proceeding to demonstrate!

And to the person at the Convention who believed in birthday conspiracies: well, I have my driver's license that proves it. It's also astatistical fact that 2 out of 22 randomly-chosen people have the same birthday... in a room of about 250 SG-1 fans, there are going to be SEVERALpeople there who are having birthdays!


	6. The Threat of the Thief

**The Threat of the Thief  
**by Cleo the Muse  
Rating: Teens  
Genre: General, Humor, Missing Scene/Epilogue  
Warnings: One little curse word, gratuitous Tok'ra-bashing, slightly-more-than mild sexual innuendo.  
Episodes: Missing scene for "Avalon, Part One". Contains major spoilers for "Avalon, Part One" and "Prometheus Unbound".  
Synopsis: Response to a request/challenge by Mary... what happened at the Alpha Site?

**

* * *

The Threat of the Thief **

"_The female of the species is more deadly than the male_."

-- Rudyard Kipling, "The Female of the Species"

Gunnery Sergeant Jimmy Emerson grinned. "Oh, come on, Lieutenant, this is a cake walk. We're just going to the Alpha Site for a supply run and your off-world orientation. Five day mission, hot food, soft bedding... easy stuff."

Second Lieutenant Ed Barger didn't look convinced. "Yeah, Gunny, but it's _off-world_. Doesn't that freak you out?"

_All the time,_ Emerson thought, but only shrugged outwardly. "You get used to it. Hell, most of these planets don't look that much different from Earth, anyhow. They say General O'Neill used to complain about it all the time back when he was a Colonel."

"Yeah, but it's still... different."

"Not so much, Barger," said Major Hendricks, entering the 'Gate room along with the final member of SG-12, Staff Sergeant Klopel. "Trees look the same, sky looks the same, even the _air_ smells the same. That's partly why they chose this particular planet for the Alpha Site, Lieutenant, 'cause it feels like home. You wouldn't know it from Colorado."

"Except for how you get there," chipped in Klopel as the Air Force sergeant dubbed "The Chevron Guy" announced the final step of the dialing sequence. "Now, going through the 'Gate beats the best at Six Flags any day."

The wormhole flushed outward, and Barger gulped. "I never liked roller coasters," he admitted, eyeing the brilliant event horizon.

"You'll like this one," Emerson promised. _And if 'Gate travel doesn't make you toss your cookies, _nothin' _will._

"SG-12, you're cleared to depart," General Landry announced over the intercom.

"You heard the man!" Hendricks barked. "Klopel, get the FRED moving."

"Yes, sir."

"Emerson? Let's get Barger's feet wet."

The trio of Marines stepped up to the Stargate after the transport cleared, pausing just long enough for Barger to admire the rippling surface. Then, sharing a knowing look, Emerson and Hendricks pushed the young lieutenant through the 'Gate.

A wild eternity of a ride later (that actually took only a few seconds) SG-12 arrived in the Alpha Site 'Gate room. Barger had just barely managed to keep his feet on the exit, and was now staring about with a dumb expression on his face. "But this--"

"Looks just like Earth," Emerson grinned. "Told ya."

"I thought the Stargate would be on the surface."

"It used to be, 'til they built the bunker below ground," Hendricks answered. "Second Alpha Site in a row built like the SGC, actually. The first got compromised by the Replicators, but this one's been up for a few months, now."

A blue BDU-clad man stepped forward. "Welcome back to Alpha Site, SG-12."

"Thanks, sir," the Marine major replied. "Brought us a newbie, Colonel... Second Lieutenant Barger. He's our new linguist. Lieutenant, this is Lieutenant Colonel Pearce... he's the Alpha Site commander."

Pearce nodded. "Welcome to the Stargate program," he acknowledged. "Not much happens around here anymore but research. We no longer house the Tok'ra or the Jaffa Rebellion, so it stays pretty quiet, for the most part."

"Occasionally, they get a drop-in from one or the other, but those are few and far between," Emerson explained with a grin, "so if you joined the SGC to meet women, you're SOL."

"Yeah, the Jaffa women could break you in half, and the Tok'ra women really _do_ have two minds to make up," chipped in Klopel. "But if you go for that sort of thing--"

"I'm married," Barger blurted. "Four months next week." Anything else he might have said was interrupted by the sudden activation of the Stargate. Swearing, the airmen around the 'Gate scrambled to move the FRED, just barely getting it out of the way of the vortex before it exploded outward.

"No signal, Colonel!" called a tech who had scrambled to a computer terminal.

"Heads up, people!" shouted Pearce.

The SG-12 Marines dropped their packs and readied their weapons. They didn't have to wait long, as a slim figure stepped through just moments after the event horizon had settled and began eyeing the room with an amused smirk. "Well, well, well... Not _quite_ what I'd expected."

Pearce stepped forward a pace as the wormhole disengaged. "Identify yourself, ma'am."

Given the copious amounts of black leather and skin the attractive woman displayed, Emerson surmised she was either a Tok'ra or an interstellar hooker. _Either that or cast member from _The Matrix, he thought wickedly, his initial tension subsiding.

"Vala. Vala Mal Doran," she smiled, not at all fazed by the many weapons pointed her direction. Slowly and deliberately, she set down the satchel she had been carrying over her shoulder, placing the other hand on her hip. "That's an awful lot of firepower for little ol' me, boys."

"Just being precautious," Pearce explained. "I'm Lieutenant Colonel Pearce of the United States Air Force. How did you learn of this 'Gate address?"

"From a lady who knows a man, who just so _happens_ to have a Tok'ra symbiote in his head," she explained. "I come bearing valuable information that Doctor Daniel Jackson will just be _dying_ to get."

_What... again?_ Emerson grinned to himself, witnessing a similar expression on Klopel's face.

"And just what would this information be, Miss Mal Doran?"

"A treasure map," Vala answered, "left behind by the Gate Builders before their disappearance thousands of years ago."

"You mean the Ancients?"

"Exactly. Now when I talked to the Tok'ra about it, they were naturally anxious to gain the treasure for themselves. I insisted only an expert on the Ancients could interpret this tablet, and to that end I came seeking Daniel's expertise." She grinned broadly. "He and I go _way_ back. I'm sure he'd be absolutely _thrilled_ to hear from me again."

Pearce looked nonplussed, gesturing toward SG-12. "While I'm sure Doctor Jackson would gladly vouch for you Miss Mal Doran, we do have protocols to adhere to. I'm afraid you're going to have to go with these gentlemen here while we verify your claims."

"Excellent!" she beamed, practically hopping down the Stargate's steps. "Where are we going, boys?"

Emerson gingerly picked up the satchel she had discarded as Hendricks answered, "To a more secure location within this facility, ma'am."

"You mean a holding cell? I have fond memories of the holding cells aboard your ship, _Prometheus_," Vala smiled, gamely following the major out of the 'Gate room and through the narrow halls. "Tell me, do I get to wear one of those adorable blue suits again?"

"I'm sure we could arrange for one for you, ma'am," Hendricks replied in bemusement, stopping in front of a metal door which bore a single small window. "In here, please."

The simple twelve-by-twelve room contained a table, two chairs, and a small bed. Emerson carried the satchel over to the table and eased it open. Peering inside, ha spotted a bundle of cloth lying on top.

_Hello, what have we here?_ Reaching in, he pulled out the surprisingly heavy bundle and began unwrapping it.

"What's he doing?" Vala asked. Emerson looked up to see her peering around Klopel.

"I'm searching your belongings, ma'am. We have to make sure you aren't a threat."

She crossed to the table and stood by his shoulder. "Well, I don't think it's very polite, going through a lady's things."

"It may not be polite, ma'am, but we have to be thorough." At last, the cloth was aside, and the object was revealed to be a stone tablet covered in squared-off scribbles. Emerson recognized it as the writing of the Ancients, and presumed it must be the 'treasure map' she'd insisted only Doctor Jackson could help her with. Laying it carefully aside, he dug into the satchel again, coming up with a flat piece of gold-colored metal, sculpted into a series of intricate segments. "What's this?

"Not quite sure, really," she answered, sitting on the table and plucking the object out of his hand. "I've been told it and its companion have something to do with finding the treasure, but I'll need Daniel's help to solve _that_ particular mystery."

Considering that Doctor Jackson himself was a mystery to Emerson, he let her explanation slide, delving into the bag once more. He located the second of the two flat objects, a small box containing several crystal shards, and few garments which looked too small to fit even his own twelve year-old daughter--and he would _kill_ his daughter if she _tried_ to wear anything like that.

"What's with the crystals?" he asked, going back to the box. One of the pieces was a bit larger than the others, and actually looked like it might be intact.

"Just a few little knick-knacks I picked up," she explained, pouting. "Some of them must not have liked the cold temperature between the 'Gates, but I might be able to salvage the rest."

He nodded, setting it aside once more, then turned the bag wrong-side out. "It all checks out, sir," he told Hendricks.

Vala hopped off the table. "Excellent! Now, which of you boys wants to help me get undressed?"

Barger coughed, face turning bright red. "What?"

"Undress? Disrobe, remove my clothing? You can't expect me to untie all these laces by myself, now do you?"

"Excuse me?" Emerson choked.

She deftly began loosing the buckles holding her jacket closed. "Well, you _did_ say you intended to be thorough. How can you possibly even claim to be that, if you haven't even searched me?" With a roll of her shoulders, the jacket slipped off, falling to the floor.

"Emerson? Klopel?" Hendricks asked weakly, gesturing in the alien's direction and grabbing the red-faced Barger as he stepped out the door.

_Chicken!_ Emerson hissed inwardly, scowling at his commanding officer's back. He stepped forward with a grimace. "You can keep your clothes on, ma'am, we'll just, uh--"

"Make a cursory search," Klopel finished.

_Get a hold of yourself, Jimmy! _Emerson admonished himself. _This isn't the first time you've been this close to a woman of her questionable morals!_ It was, however, the first time his proximity to such a woman had been a) in front of a fellow Marine; and b) an alien.

Thinking himself rather clever, Emerson stepped around to her backside and began lightly patting her down, starting at the weird collar-thing at the nape of her neck.

"Go on, don't be shy," he heard her say, and glanced up to catch sight of a rather hard swallow from Klopel, whose hands were placed just below her shoulders. It wasn't easy to tell if a black man was blushing, but the sergeant's skin certainly appeared a lot darker than normal.

"It wouldn't be appropriate, ma'am," he managed, lifting his hands away and resuming his frisk much lower on her torso.

Emerson reached the small of her back, feeling rather foolish. Her clothes were skin-tight, how could she _possibly_ be hiding anything in them? As he moved to step away, she looked over her shoulder and impishly said, "Don't stop now, soldier boy, you haven't gotten to the good part yet."

"I think I'm done," he answered quickly.

"Me, too," Klopel agreed, removing his hands from her hips.

"Really? Your turn, then," she grinned, grabbing for Klopel.

"Gunny!" he yelped, and Emerson dove forward to save his teammate from the deranged alien.

Thus it was that interesting tableau in which Colonel Pearce, Major Hendricks, and the impressionable young Lieutenant Barger found them: Klopel's defensive efforts had deflected Vala's hands downward as she had reached for the zipper on his ballistic vest, leaving her outstretched fingers resting slightly below his belt, his own hands seemingly guiding her arms in that direction. Emerson, having made a frantic grab for her waist in his noble effort to pull her off Klopel, had overshot his mark slightly, ending up with his hands considerably higher than intended.

Pearce cleared his throat. "Are we interrupting something, gentlemen?"

"Just getting to know one another," Vala replied cheekily, running one hand back up Klopel's vest.

Emerson coughed, quickly removing his hands from the their resting spots as he and Klopel abruptly turned to face the door. "There was a bit of a misunderstanding, sir," he managed.

"Won't happen again, sir," Klopel added, blinking furiously as he attempted to rein in his emotions.

At Hendricks' gesture, Barger stepped over to the table with a heavy metal briefcase and began carefully placing the tablet and Vala's other possessions into the foam cut-outs. "Well since you have gotten so well-acquainted, sergeants, you can accompany Miss Mal Doran back to Earth."

_You're letting her go to Earth?_ Emerson gulped, visions of the alien woman sitting on General Landry's desk and swinging her feet swimming through his head. And Heaven help the man who got too close to her wandering hands.

Vala placed those hands on her hips. "You're letting me travel to Earth?"

"_I'm_ not," Pearce answered, "but apparently Doctor Jackson recently received word from the Tok'ra that you might be on your way here. _He_'s the one who decided to let you through."  
She bent down, picked up her jacket, and slung it over one shoulder. "I _knew_ I could count on my Daniel! Well, then what are we waiting for?"

Emerson accepted the case from Barger, giving the young lieutenant a look promising swift retribution if word of this encounter found its way to the SGC rumor mill. Luckily, he seemed to get the message.

Following his superiors and the smug woman out of the holding cell, the troupe made their way back to the 'Gate room. The airman manning the DHD punched in the sequence for Earth, then the tech behind the computer announced the transmission of the Alpha Site IDC.

Trailing behind Vala as she mounted the steps, Emerson was hoping to get through to Earth and pass her off to the capable hands of Doctor Jackson without further incident. Even so, he was hardly surprised when turned around just shy of the event horizon, and gave the room a wave. "Thank you boys for your hospitality. You sure know how to make a girl feel welcome!" she grinned. Without warning, she gave Emerson a playful swat on the behind before stepping backward through the 'Gate.

He gulped. _So much for avoiding the rumor mill_...

* * *

Author's Notes:  
Thank you to all the wonderful people who have made _this _girl feel welcome to the SG-1 fanfic world! Admiral, Alisa Russell, Alison M, Allison, Angel Queen, angw, Blonde-Existentialist, Chas54, Cora, CynicAlb, Diane, The Dreamer Lady, gatermage, Grace, hawk stout, happy molecule, Hawk50, Hellen, Jan Q, Janet Moonshine, Jeanida Myrishi, Jenn R, Jessie88, Jill Dahlinghaus, Jordan Loki, Kanikan, kasluvsg1, Kurt the Military Brat, La Diosa, Lady Raider, Laura M, Loethalis, logo, Lord Magus, Mary, Matt1969, Meriem Clayton, Mierin, Morien Alexander, Mrs. M, mtee, Nancy Montague, Nicola Swan, Nighshae, Paula Cole, Pentagon Merlin, PhDelicious, Porthos1013, Rainey, Sabine Holterman, Sara, SG-Fan, Shannon K, Snail-sama, Stephanie Schultz, stevewraith, Tori... (**GASP**)... and, of course, Yuma! 

I hope I didn't miss anyone :)

For those of you who DON'T know, the antics of Vala and Daniel continue in my new series, "The Archaeologist" :)


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